Ignite

“Is a gift defined by the package in which it arrives? Some of the most radically life changing gifts come in packaging we’d rarely expect. Example? An engagement ring comes in very small packaging, yet when the promise the ring itself represents is valued and respected by both parties involved, an engagement ring box represents the beginning of a new life. It’s amazing how something packaged in such a small box can change a person’s life in an instant.
We always forget the packaging and always remember what was inside. The same will go for us. Whether our packaging (our body) is beautiful, or whether the packaging has some dents and scratches and lacks luster, we won’t be remembered forever for how we appear. The memory of our appearance will fade in such a short time once our souls depart from our bodies. What will last? The gifts you have been blessed with by your Creator to share with the world. We will be remembered by what we gave to others. The part of us that lives on may not be accompanied by a name or a face; yet it is the most important, because it was left behind by the Devine within us.
Too often we allow ourselves to be defined by the salary we make, the car we drive, the house we build. When you are gone, all of those things will belong to someone else - they will no longer belong to you. I believe that’s why so many people are so unhappy, they are defined by things that can be replaced. We weren’t made for this purpose.
The box of the engagement ring is simply there to protect something very precious - not the ring itself, but the idea and promise that the ring represents. Your body is simply the vehicle in which your gifts are delivered…
Isn’t it time you learn what those gifts are? Isn’t it time you begin sharing?
After all, when you are gone, do you simply want to leave behind material, or do you want to leave behind things that can be passed down to hundreds or possibly thousands more? Your name or image may not be attached, yet it is your very essence - your soul - that lives on through your gifts to the world.”

“We are soul mates,” she said to me.

I had been staring up at the starry Colorado sky, lost in thought of the conversation we’d had over the previous two hours. Her statement snapped my gaze back to her. I can’t imagine the emotions my face showed in that moment: fear, excitement, wonder… 

I had never had another human say anything to me so simply, yet with such conviction and purpose. I could hear truth in her voice. Upon locking eyes with her, I knew she truly meant what she had said. 

My emotions from the moment were so strong and overwhelming I had become speechless.

“We have many soul mates - people we connect with on a level so deep it moves our soul,” she said through a smile. 

I knew exactly what she meant. It’s hard to explain, the first time we met I felt as if my soul were on fire. The energy she brought to the room, to my being, was unmistakable - beautiful. We understood one another.

Here I stood, next to someone I had met only two days earlier, and I could’ve danced I felt so ecstatic! At the time, I did not have the capacity to understand what that moment meant for me and my soul. I found myself emotionally confused in the following days. Even worse, I was terrified again. What did all of these feelings mean?

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Prior to attending the BOLD Academy in Boulder, CO, my soul was anything but on fire. I felt as if everything in my life was wrong or wasn’t good enough. I had a list of accomplishments, yet I felt fulfilled by none of them. Every day I felt a little more empty. Every day I prayed for God to show me what I needed to do, where I needed to be, and what I needed to say for others to understand what I was feeling.

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Two months after leaving Colorado, I was back to where I had started. The excitement of everything I’d experienced had worn off, and I was miserable. I found myself longing for the connection I had experienced with a soul mate in Colorado. 

I thought back to that night under the Colorado sky, and my heart leapt with joy. 

“Why?” I said aloud. With every fiber of my being I wanted to know. For years I’d been longing for more, but I didn’t know what I was searching for. On this night, I was going to get my answer from the last person I ever expected it to come from - myself.

I realized I had been a stranger to my True Self. I was disappointed and miserable because my decisions and actions had continuously “drugged” my soul back to sleep whenever it would try to whisper, “I’m here…there is more…” Traveling to Colorado was the first time I had listened to my True Self since before I’d graduated from high school. 

Prior to this adventure I had turned down other great opportunities. I always had an excuse. All of those excuses were just fear. “I can’t leave, my grandpa is ill.” “I can’t go, I’m in a relationship.” “My mom and dad would be so devastated if I left home.” It was all fear.

To be completely honest, when I decided to go to Colorado, I was terrified. In fact, even after I left I was contemplating turning around. “If I get one hour away and still feel this terrified, I’m turning around.”

Something amazing happened in that hour in my car. I had finally leaned into my fear by leaving that morning, and, as it always does, the fear turned to excitement. I knew I’d made the right choice. It wasn’t easy, but it was right.

It had taken months for me to grow into that moment and understand the meaning of that starry night in Colorado - my soul’s awakening. It was the beginning of my journey.

It all goes back to the decision to keep driving past my fear. Because of that choice, my True Self awoke underneath a beautiful starry sky, with a soulmate by my side.

And nothing has been the same since…

A very special thank you to Denise Duquette for being an amazing soul mate and helping inspire this post (and even helped in editing!) Also a huge thanks to my dear friend Courtney Williams for reading and editing!

Photo Credits: 365q.ca

“When a sense of dissatisfaction persists, that means it was placed there by God for one reason only: you need to change everything and move forward. I’ve been through this before. Whenever I refused to follow my fate, something very hard to beat would happen in my life… When faced with loss, there is no point in trying to recover what has been; it’s best to take advantage of the large space that opens up before us and fill it with something new. In theory, every loss is for our own good…” -Paulo Coelho-

I had just arrived in Raleigh, NC. It was around 9:30 at night and I had a burning desire to lace up my shoes and jog. Running had become my escape, my way to block out all of the chatter in my head and forget about troubles. I put my headphones in, turned my playlist on random, walked to the street and began to run.

I couldn’t clear my head on this night. Things hadn’t been perfect in my life. One loss had been accompanied by another. My hope had started to diminish, and even worse, my faith had hit rock bottom. I was angry, sad, humiliated, and heartbroken. I looked up and exhaled a cloud of steam into the air. The sky was clear and seemed so large because it wasn’t restricted by mountains as the sky had been at my previous home. I took the time to gaze at the stars while I was jogging and I began to feel an overwhelming since of loss, but it wasn’t the loss of someone else or something, I realized how lost I felt. I took a minute to let that sink in - to really feel the emotions that came with my realization. Tears began to roll down my face.

I had gotten to a place I didn’t think I would ever find myself. I felt as if my soul had been entirely ripped out of my body. “Everything is You” by Eli Young Band began playing through my headphones, accelerating the speed at which tears rolled from my eyes. It was at this moment that the meteor shower began. I stopped jogging and stood watching as each meteor flashed through the sky and vanished as quickly as it had appeared. Fleeting moments flashed through my head, and I began to make a connection.

People and events are meteors in our life. They appear and are a brilliant and beautiful sight. Just as we gain hope from wishing on shooting stars, these people and events are so inspiring they give us hope that there is more to look forward to than what we originally thought. Some of these things exit as quickly as they enter your life, and when they do, they leave a gaping hole. When I first had this thought I was bitter. Why and how could this happen? Why would we be subjected to what felt like torture at times?

Something bigger and bolder began to form in my head, however. This moment itself was fleeting. The meteor shower wouldn’t last long, nor would the feelings that I had at that moment. I allowed myself to feel the pain and see the beauty of the moment. I felt in my soul that this was my Creator’s way of showing me that I was exactly where I needed to be. It was a beautiful moment that I knew wouldn’t last - I had to take the time to appreciate and be humbled. In that instant, I knew that I needed to begin to appreciate situations for what they are, good or bad, and feel the emotions and feelings that come and learn from them. I had held onto anger and had been spiteful for too long.

I began to see that the anger and pain I had been holding was breaking my soul. By clinging to those feelings, I was allowing them to dictate my life. I was not in control. All of the things which had happened that I was trying to forget about were controlling me. This was all taking me farther away from my true path. In that moment, I let it all go. Where resentment had been, there was appreciation for lessons learned, for moments I will always cherish, and for blessings I hadn’t been able to see because of the hurt I felt. The dissatisfaction I had felt for so long began to subside because I knew I was finally on the right path. I began to realize I had been avoiding the path I should have been on long before this recent pain. I always had an excuse to not travel on my true path, and I had always found a reason to put it off. This was the universe pushing me back in the right direction.

It’s funny how experiencing loss and pain will make you begin to search within yourself. When life led me to a dark place I came to a startling realization: although events in my life had left me stunned and hurt, I had been hurting myself more because I hadn’t been true to my own destiny for such a long time. We all must realize that life gets much easier when we lean into the things we know are right. Those things are what lead you to finding your true self and true happiness.

Thanks to 365q.ca for the image.

Each of us are blessed with a spark - something that drives us, something that fills us with joy, and something that defines who we are. Some of us, don’t believe in this essence anymore. Some of us have forgotten how to listen to our hearts and souls and turn cold to others upon their revealing of a greater calling.
It is that spark, and the feelings that we get from it, that resides at the core of every person’s existence. We all do not share the same spark, but we all have the same stirring in our soul when we find our spark, or when we begin to come close to finding our purpose. Imagine if we all embraced that spark, and what if…what if instead of looking for the negative in every person, we looked for their spark. How much more connected would we be? How much different would the world be? How much more of an impact could we make?
Far too often we try to remove the part(s) of ourselves that make us stand out so that we may fit in, but none of us were were made to fit into one mold with anyone else. This has created what I feel is the greatest crisis of our time - we are losing our identities within.
Society now tells us that things are black and white and there is no in between. Everyone is told they must go through certain steps to “become” who they are supposed to be.
I am here to tell you, “You already ARE who you need to be. You already ARE the answer to a problem the world has. All you must do is make a decision, and it is a very simple decision: Continue to allow circumstances and other people to mold who you are, or make the decision to show the world who you are and what you have to offer. It is your right as a human to write your own story. My challenge to you: “Pick up the pen.”